Monday, July 11, 2011

Back to my Bike

Well, the time since my last blog has been called "The Month of Mayhem that Jumped into June" and quite honestly....I haven't touched my bike since then.  Shameful isn't it?  But now my family and friends have conspired against me and have decided to be obnoxious and force me onto my bike.   Since, I love my friends and family, I have decided to be accommodating.  I smile and say, "as you wish" just like Wesley in The Princess Bride.  (And if you believe that, well, you need to protect your bank account because someone is going to sell you something, probably expensive.)  In all honesty, I was on my bike, but was not very accommodating.  I whined ALOT.  But, after all, I really did feel like I was going to throw up and then I really did want to know what happens when you vomit on a bike.  Does it go straight down and dribble off your leg?  Does it projectile out and splat in the road?  Does it stream behind you?  This is a very scientific question and one that I am sure that I will someday discover.  Since, I am the vomit queen, I'm betting on the fact that someday after thorough calculations,  I will report my findings.

Now on the plus side, I biked far longed than I thought I would.  When we started, I reminded everyone that we were going BLOCKS, not miles.  However, Erik, ignored me and kept going.  I very sweetly reminded him that we could turn right here and go back home.  I think he is deaf.  So, I just started whining more.  Then everyone went deaf.  I hate when I talk and nobody listens to me.  I think it is quite rude.  Anyway, we went 5.12 miles.  Then, I went home, got in the pool, cooled off,  and went to celebrate with Mexican food.  After all...I deserved it.  I tried to make Erik pay, but it didn't work.  Maybe he needs hearing aids?

Now, what did I learn on this VERY LONG  bike ride?
1.  My friends ignore me.
2.  People who drive by and see that you are struggling to keep up won't stop and pick you up even if they know you!  Thanks alot to Sam and the girls.
4.  If you are riding with someone else and they are carrying your water, it is good to have a bell that you can ring.  Then they can be like your "cabana boy." 
5.  It is very hard to do "SOS" on a bike bell.  Trust me, I tried. You can't differentiate between long and short.
6.  I found my Haloween costume for next year.  I'm going to "borrow" a real estate sign that says "I'm gorgeous inside" and hang it around my neck. (I'll be sure to post pictures.)

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